Running two blogs...this may be the undoing of me.

So, i've started a parallel blog. the erasmus blog. this is not by my own choice btw.

as part of erasmus/co-op and "in preparation" for the Fourth Year. now this isn't something to get annoyed about collegwise. i actually planed to do this anyway...just not on a separate blog. i may or may not integrate. anyway here's the link

http://jonathanweirirl.blogspot.com/

if your interested. but this is where its at.

i also got a sony NEX-5 DSLR yesterday so i may yet turn photographer.

i'll try and blog better soon but i can't summon the effort yet. :D

Jonnie out

"Cold Snap" - - - -Blog hi-jack ahead

Sweet Jesus Public of Ireland!!!

Calm the fuck down. seriously. its cold. deal with it.

ok, so, the back story.

actually no. change of topic. i'll sum up quickly though that its damn cold(for Ireland) and everyone exagerates it as ever.

MIDWEEK

congratulations tv3 you've outdone yourself this time. i thought Vincent Browne was bad, but who the fuck is the bint on MIDWEEK. seriously, she must have a first class degree in stating the bleeding obvious and a masters in annoying voices and stupid questions.

we've all heard the cow's/ greenhouse gas arguement years ago. she just followed it for 10 minutes with a "scientific expert"

she's questioning the existence of global warming because its a damn cold winter.

Vincent Browne is at least a quality journalist to start with. its simply his television manner that annoys me. but the closest thing to an article this cow has ever written is more than likely titled something like "my husband tried to eat my face" or "my dog ate my hair while i was sleeping".

apologies for the haphazard nature of this blog. but i'm writing as it unfolds.

jesus its terrible. you know what. its not even worth it for a blog... TV...off...

Back again soon when i reclaim my life properly.

Remember Kids. Stay out of school if you want to enjoy your being.

Jonnie out.

Yo esé how long is your essay

s'happenin hipsters and hipstresses,

its the third coming of Jonnie! and this time he's on a mission!!!

so, college has been manic, and i've not had a whole lot of time for myself. the little that i've had i've spent on myself. alas the blog has been neglected. but heres the light at the end of the tunnel!!!

My news!!!

right so anyone reading this who knows me will know that i'm off to Finland, more specifically Mikkeli in the East of Finland from the 10th of January through the middle of May. exciting times. so far the ferries are booked as myself and two other intrepid designers will be travelling the 4000 km by my car. more about that later.

My car:-
so, the golf of the previous rants is gone, left, sold, imithe! and has been replaced by a delightfully rapid Saab 9-3 turbo. 2 litres of turbo charged petrol entertainment. its been three weeks, so far... 27.5 MPG is my best. possibly material for another blog there. anywho, this epic vehicle is my new personal design challenge after my personal success with the Golf.



so far its been OEM alloys and tow-bar removal with the saab. stereo's on the way.



anyway moving on. I've decided to try and get back into this blogging lark. Finland is shaping up to be pretty good fun, however the whole 5 hours of daylight thing, coupled with the -30 Celsius thing may become wearisome. so this blog will be a useful distraction.

as a secondary function. i deem that the frostbitten extremities of the thick Irish lads will be most pleasing to the internet gnomes. so i intend to blog the expedition.

now to my most fun fun fun thought. which is a camera mounted in the car for the 4 day trip to capture any humor, stupor...and of course...Barry. i intend to edit footage to create a daily video blog for the journey. so watch carefully for Barry being thrown out the window at 70mph. :D

anyway i has work at 5am...and its now quarter to 23 as they say in the army so i'm off. blog again soon.

Jonnie out

Response to Tynermeister cos blogspot won't let me comment

you know what, you're right.

i actually agree with most of what you've said. however, while i agree that the work is under appreciated by us, i also believe that the administration behind the whole course is the worst since the bush administration. seriously, it has been an absolute shambles since we went into second year. Lenny can indeed go die in a fire, however in my view his module is one that sets us apart from any other design course. and without him i think we'd be no-where near our current standard. i kind of admire his decision to totally overhaul his module, but his lack of open-mindedness as the module goes on has been a major stumbling block.

the main issue is the lack of communication and clarity. in fairness, no one was doing the work when we should have been but the timing has been horrible. and there are more examples than i'm gonna go into. my other main issue is the way we are treated with regard to the workload. in fairness, if you were working a 9-6 job and then working until 10 at night at home, plus the weekends, you'd quit. especially when your bosses time keeping is as terrible as the lecturers.

now in my own case and a few others we have had to work to stay in college and this has simply created tension. one which we shouldn't allow to be voiced in the studio, because, i'm agreeing with you, our year is crap and the majority of those complaining were latching onto our disquiet.

this being my last weekend of work, i can see the light at the end of the tunnel and honestly, now, i can't see the big fuss... but thats the designer nature i suppose, we live in the moment. i personally wish i could be as cool headed as some. and you know who i'm talking about. i also want their writing and setching ability. but there you go. such is life.

Hey what's your problem!?!

Stupid Americans...

...stupid stupid annoying Americans...

I speak not of Americans in general but of a localised group of US citizens. More specifically the 4/5th generation Irish American who comes to ireland to "get back to their roots"

The thing is... What the fuck do they know about their roots? Really? The talk about Ireland as if its a quaint theme park where the different areas are all these small villages with a core population of village drunks complimented by an equal population of barmen.

But they're Irish... DEFINITELY Irish... Even though they plead ignorance to the fact that ireland... While now economically fucked was once host to some of the biggest technology firms and therefore technological advances of the 1990's.

And of course they must have the essential póg mó thóin sticker/tattoo.

...do they even get that that particular phrase was invented by Americans... What a meeting that must have been. Marketing execs sprawled around a big conference table in americaville USA.

"St. Patricks days coming."


"lots of Irish around"

"let's give um bumper stickers to express their irishness!"

"yeah but we need an Irish phrase"

"..."

"hey go on google translate"

"what'll I type in?"

"kiss my ass"

"genius! Give that man a promotion"

So they took an American phrase... Stuck it through google translate and presto change marketing gold

Little do they no that to the real Irish this sticker/tattoo is akin to a big sticker saying I know nothing about my heritage.

...usually cos their too wrapped up in their own lives.

Live for now not for what you think the marketing companies want you to live for...


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone 4

Blogs for the Bloggers

I'm back bitches!

Right where to begin. Firstly with apologies.

To my loyal followers, I know your secretly out there. I'm sorry. I'll endeavour to do better.
To Cayla-sphere, who tried to motivate me... I'm sorry I'm unmotivatable…but thanks for trying.
And finally to myself... I'm sorry me. Sorry for convincing me that I could keep up a blog. Sorry for giving up after 2 days.

Now back to business.

Blogging ain't all it cracked up to be, As an interweb visitor and a regular patron of the random shite on the Internet cafe I am partial to a few blogs,
However I have odd taste in blogs.
The main type I read is the comedy/ comic blog, stuff like cracked, And cyanide and happiness,
In fact the main one I aspire to be like is surviving the world. I think Dante Shepard is a genius and deserves every credit for an enlightening and relevant photo blog.
But you say incredulously, thats not a blog! That's a photo web comic. Well yes…yes and no. Personally I think a blog is a regularly updated archive of thoughts and theories and not necessarily an online diary in the conventional sense. As a reader I do of course respect people who do that. I even read them, my black band buddy Cayla even keeps an excellent one I read on a regular basis. However as an individual I don't feel the need to tell my life story to the world. My idea of a blog is writing about stuff that interests me/amuses me.
Now for the sake of my own sanity I aim to make them either funny or humorously written. But I want my blogs to make people smile in an old fashioned... I ain't in it for the money (shine ya shooes for ya mister) kinda way.
A blog should never feel to contrived either í mo thuarim féin. Or feel like it was written out of pressure to write one disregarding lack of subject.

And maybe that's why I gave up after two days. I just didn't have any subjects. The way my summer has been going I've not really had much time to myself and that time has been spent largely catching up on my shut eye... And not I regret to inform you writing for you to read. (you can curse the blight of shift work for me)

Anyway as I'm back to college on the 6th I wanted to get the blog going again. Hopefully it'll update more regularly as I'll be on sensible hours and with my course... Something fun to talk about. So there it is... A blog about blogging.

Jonnie out

Also I told myself I wouldn't talk about it but I haven't figured out how to get rid of this
\/\/\/

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone 4

Location:Ireland

Ya Gotta Be Loved To Be Hated To Be Appreciated

so yesterday was the world cup match between Portugal and Spain. possibly the most anticipated world cup match of this tournament. wow...many of you may say... soccer...who gives a oven-baked-shit.

however for me...this is one of the tournaments i'll actually watch. its for a few reasons, the first is that its the world cup finals...once your out of the group stages there is genuine competition...something to watch...the second one is the politics. it is hilarious the speculation that goes on surrounding nations playing each other. how the hell does a teams geographical location and political administration affect how their national football team plays. but somehow Bill O'Herlihy on RTE sports manages to rant for ages about how south Korea have something to prove because they get a bad rap in the press. and therefore stand a chance of beating Argentina.

have you honestly ever seen a nation so riled up as when Thierry Henry handballed Frances way into the world cup. 7/8 months on and everyone is still talking about it...it became a national concern greater than the big freeze...hilarious.

And of course who could forget the eternal rivalry of England and Germany...IT WAS 65 YEARS AGO!!!!!!!! i get that its a big deal but this is football!!!! i honestly can't wait for Iraq or Afghanistan to get a team into the world cup in the same group as the US. that day....however many years away...i will weep with joy.

anyway i digress...

where was i... so when at work yesterday everyone was talking about the match i had a mild interest. oh they said...almost queuing up to share their tabloid paper match analysis...i think Spain will go through... (well all except one guy...who is Portuguese...HI Portuguese guy who works in the Airside bar...someday i will find out your name)... then they all continued with... how bad it'll be nice to see Ronaldo go home the cocky shit.

Now call me cynical. But all these people support either Liverpool or Manchester United...its Ireland...we jump on the bandwagon of the best team. always have. always will. FACT. just look at Munster rugby. and when Ronaldo played for Man U he was their Wonderkid. Not much has changed since he went to Real Madrid really except the politics kinda comes back into it when he plays against Man U. so why oh why is he so hated as a Portugal team player...

after careful match analysis(pffft) and lots of pondering using my thoughtful pose, here's my conclusion. he's not a Portugal team player, he a player who happens to run around with the Portuguese team for 90 minutes. he carries the team.he gets the ball and everyone expects there to follow a spectacular goal. so he's spectacularly talented...thats why we hate him...no i say, we don't go around wishing Messi a shit world cup. and he's Ronaldo's main competition in the bid for greatest player in the world.

So, Messi vs Ronaldo

My best guess after yet more analysis(pfffft) and speculation is that Ronaldo is just a little too close to home. after all Ireland follows the premiership, but Messi doesn't play in that. so Ronaldo was always that bit more loved than Messi in the UK and Ireland, so first he was loved, but then he left and his talent gets him hated in the area of his old club, despite him having done nothing wrong, and this not even being a club game?!? God i love this country.

but the fact is he should be flattered. he's managed to be one of the most appreciated footballers in modern times for his sheer talent. and that ain't something to be sniffed at. its a compliment in this country that we hate him so much. So ya gotta be loved to be hated to be appreciated and thats how it is...and that brings me back to my title.

I love it when a plan comes together. :D

QED

Jonnie

The Problem With The Eternal Struggle For "NEW"

right,

brief synopsis of the day. woke up at 10...stayed in bed

internet in bed...the epitome of human evolution.

looking for a new boot panel for my golf was my challenge. the story behind this is this.

i recently bought a new car. a 2003 mk4 VW golf. when i bought the car it was cos i was skint. seriously broke. i'd been driving my (UN)trusty 2004 Renault Megane Diesel for a year and needed to sell it so i could get some money back and buy a cheaper car...enter golf junction left.

so the golf i bought needed a bit of work. the door had a bit of damage(barely noticable), the boot latch wasn't 100%(soon fixed) but most annoyingly for me...the boot had been keyed. the mark ran the full width of the car down to primer. even worse it had been touched up with the wrong colour. anyway after every marketed scratch remover had been tried i went about getting quotes for a panel respray.

after an afternoon(two afters in one sentence...intriguing) of driving between all the repairs places in a 20 mile radius i came up with the cheapest (trustable-crucially) quote of 175 euro.

cough

cough

cough

surely a typo...

€175

nope not a typo

so off to the interweb i went in search of a boot panel in the right colour.

now i'll be the first to admit the golf in silver is a common car...(its what pisses me off so damn much about the fucking thing) ... but i never truly expected the can of worms that was lying in wait.

so as it turns out there were two different silvers put on the mk4 golf. how fucking annoying. not only that but the two are nigh on indistinguishable unless side by side. this makes calling scrapyards really shameful when you have to ask for colour codes. but anyway this got me thinking. fair enough there are many shades of blue or green. but why vary silver...silver is always silver.

then i thought...don't be stupid silver is a colour and has shades...but white shouldn't...(note to self...stop thinking of silver as sparkly white)...or black come to think of it...which brings me back to my renault..which was black and the most fuck-tardedly difficult colour to match ever. why...because renault had 30...and i'm not exagerrating...30 different variations on black over their whole range.

so... what is the deal with this constant change. why does renault not have a certain black they always use...and vw a certain silver. why this constant change...

what made vw sit down and say...

"Da, i am wery much liking our silwer for das golf. but mein designers eye thinken that it shoud be slightly bluey but not enough to make it wery noticable ya?

(i was trying to phonetically sound out your quintessential German accent, i failed and created a lisp...my bad, phonetics not my strong suit)

is it they're constant need for unnessecary engineering. their slightly OCD personalities, They're engineering moustaches taking over their brains or even perhaps their W's confusing themselves back from being v's to being w's again...(on a side note if w is said like v in german...why volkswagen and not wolkswagen?) however my own opinion is its the constant need for NEW. at the turn of the year VW needed to be able to say LOOK at our NEW paint colours, it has NEW things so you will buy it over the car with less NEW things.

and this seems to be the same with everything.

Buy this NEW Macbook Pro...its exactly the same as your old Macbook Pro...but now with a NEW SD card slot

Buy the NEW Samsung, its exactly the same software and hardware as your old Samsung but with a NEW shell

buy this NEW Can of Lynx (Axe for americans)...its exactly the same as the old one but with a NEW graphic on the can.

the market of NEW really pisses me off. its what stops me buying a rugby jersey, 6 months and theres a NEW one.

its what has stopped me buying a first gen iPhone. cos the NEW ne with the same interior but a white back was only a few months off.

and its what is stopping me getting a macbook-pro. NEW USB 3.0 is on the way.

now while this annoys me. New is good, like a new bodyshape of a car or a new safety feature or a new type of medicine. its the annoying NEW that gets to me...and is stopping me getting my keyed boot sorted :(

Jonnie out

PS

On an after note...just as i was about to hit publish i got an emergency callout to my friends stricken peugeot 206. some bolloxs let the tyres flat and engraved a local placename into the front wing (a place name you say...how retarded...i dissagree...how original i say...i commend his work but think he should learn how to spell said place name :P)

anyway after getting the car to safety i assessed the damage. "needs a new front wing" i said in my best mechanics voice using lots of whooshing noises to indicate expense. so now i need to source not only a boot..but a front wing for a peugeot...in what colour noone but the imaginary people ask...why SILVER...why do you ask *facepalm*

Jonnie out

Day 1-All Humans Are Dead

I woke up this morning to silence. all humans are DEAD...

What a way to start eh? ^^^

Anyway, i've been meaning to do this for a while, since the start of the summer minimum. But it being me*, i've been putting it off til two friends started theirs, thus creating competition, my natural enemy.

(* me = Jonathan, child of the 1990's(January to be precise), Product design 3rd year in UL(University of Limerick(Limerick in the southwest of Ireland(if your reading this you already know that(i wonder how many brackets within brackets i can use(don't worry i'll stop here(you hope))))))

Right so you have a bit on my background. mainly this will be a blog on my day, hopefully with a hilarious take on something intellectual, but i wouldn't hold my breath.

To the title, i work only five minutes from my house, at the moment two jobs, both in Shannon International Airport. The first job is in the book-shop, which will remain unnamed for google-able reasons. i've been working there since september 09, only on weekends due to my college commitments. its an ok job, standard thing really, only difference is we have a shop both airside and landside of the security checkpoint. which means all our stock has to go through security...annoying.

Now my second job, is 20 hours a week, working in the Airport Search Unit in the aforemetioned security checkpoint. ask me what i do, i'll tell you very briefly that i'm the heartless wanker that gets paid to take your cans of deodorant and knitting needles of off you. the upside for me is i'm a well-paid heartless wanker.

Now after that brief history of employment, the blog title gets explained. You may or may not be aware of the liquid ban. basically to go through airport security, any liquids need to be 100ml or less (3.5 fluid ounces) and displayed to the security staff in a clear zip-lock bag not exceeding 1Litre capacity. now one of the sub-roles in security is loading (there are about 5, they'll be explained over time i'm sure) and this involves standing out the front of the machines telling people to take their liquids out and put their laptops in a separate tray, to empty their pockets but keep on their shoes etc... this is ok...but at times you get stuck out there for what seems like days so you streamline your sentences, humans are a fickle thing, and working in security you learn quickly that fickle is a really polite word for dense, stupid, and fuck-tardedly ignorant. thus you end up saying the same thing to every person who comes through individually. hence the streamlined sentences. such as "liquids, gels and pastes need to be out in a clear plastic bag and under 100ml, Laptops in a separate tray please"

i'm only seasonal staff and have only been back 2 months-ish, by august it'll be so streamlined it will be a series of grunts and nothing more.

so thats the origins of the title explained, and where i'll conclude my first post,

to finish i'm gonna put down some ground rules/info to motivate/keep myself in check. i'll have these in my info too.

1-post once a week minimum (standard self promise)

2-keep each blog confined to two topics max (i'll try not to ramble)

3-keep it varied, the same topic on repeat is shit

4-post some other type of thing (e.g. pics, vid's, sketches, or something)(will be ignored very fast)

5-recommend shit once in a while

info

1-i will swear, no apologies for this, its how i am. but i will not fucking swear unnecessarily (haha old joke)

2-feel free to comment me, i may or may not reply

3-once a week i will post a list of random thoughts i've written down. these won't have fitted in a blog so i don't wanna waste em. enjoy or hate i don't give a shit

expect these to change